Are all things fully "considered"

I want to be mad I want to flail my arms kick and scream! I want to cry and say how UNFAIR life has been for me- but I can't. Its true - a truth- in the midst of other things going on.
We had a big "pow wow" today. I realize that I kept a lot in (past non disclosures) but I also told a lot. During that time in my life I was afraid- I was angry and no one could help me- or be
willing to.
I see and hear the apologetic words and wavering voices sorrowful for past infractions of faithful friendship, relationship and family. Most times I hear the silence of knowing what was wrong and how to correct it and no one moving toward "corrective action."
I waver emotionally blowing swirling in the wind of past present and future. I am none of those things fully but the sum of them all.
Waffle and chicken wings in mild sauce - that was my "dinner" I am aching physically and literally please God don't let this foolishness be the end of me.

Opening Up- for real real

opening up.. its cool. people need people.. thats why everyone so effed up they aint got nobody to just "love" them with out the bullsh*t and flossin or worryin about if they got to give or get sex. just someone to hear them and not think twice about what "place" in life they are in. What they have or dont have. Its a horrible place to be and not have anyone here on Earth that cares, for real. I know there are a lot of people that are out there like that. listening to Kid Cudi Day and nite lots of truth. I know we missed it cause we supposed to have everything we need but we keep sending people to someone else to help them. Heavenly or not. I just want the true truth. I just want the real real.
thanks for listening